You wanna be startin' something? You've got to be startin' something.

I'm so busy here, all of the time. It's worrisome, because I don't want to be this way for the rest of my life. But when I stop to think about it, I have nothing to worry about - I'll graduate from school soon, and then not have classes to worry about until I go to grad school in the far distant future. My online history classes hang over my head constantly, with this sense of - should be doing, should be doing, should be doing. I'm trying to come at it instead from a *could* be doing perspective so that I'm not constantly berating myself. Besides, I'm making all A's thus far in each class, and I'm on top of it. But I've also got my internship "class" (aka writeups of my weeks) to take care of, as well as a midterm assessment for the Wofford Denius Music Industry Scholarship portion of all of this. Phew. Happily, I have been pretty productive today, and it's only 8pm, meaning I've got the rest of the evening to do a little history homework, catch up on my writeups for the internship class, and maybe even have time to watch a movie or read or something. Finding "me" time with two other people living in my room is difficult, and I think I feel so relieved when it happens that I tend to just sit and eat and do not much else, because I am just so overwhelmed with a sense of, "aaaaah-lone." And it's nice.

My thoughts are all kinds of muddled today; it's been a rough one. The subway was CRAMMED with people, and I got pushed all around holding my giant bag from Bed, Bath & Beyond with an egg crate in there so that I might actually get a decent night's sleep this last month and a half I have in New York. My good friend (and possible future roommate!) Kristin is leaving tomorrow, and seeing in here eyes all the different, overwhelming feelings she's feeling is just my first taste of what I'll feel come August 15th. I'm hoping to see her this evening, but I haven't heard from her yet, so we'll see. I know she has a LOT of people she will want to see, and I got her for 7 hours yesterday, so I will definitely NOT be offended if we can't see each other one more time. We went apartment hunting together yesterday to find a place we'd want to move into, and after getting lost in an extremely Orthodox Jewish part of Williamsburgh, we finally wandered into the slightly more hipsterish and comfortable area. I'm afraid about prices, because the part we liked was pretty close(ish) to the waterfront, which I'm guessing makes it more expensive. But the neighborhood was great, and we had dinner at a Mexican restaurant, which made me feel even more at home. Then, we went to Union Square because we heard there was a Michael Jackson dance party happening, but alas, it had broken up by the time we got there (there was no trace of it at all - in fact, I keep trying to find the MJ dance parties that I know have been happening around the city, and so far haven't found one. It's a conspiracy!!!) We then decided it was movie time. Unfortunately, we wasted $12 and close to 2 hours on "Year One." Don't bother, people. Seriously. It's terrible. "The Hangover" was better, and I didn't even like THAT one that much. "Away We Go" is the best film I've seen in a long time. Actually, I'm currently listening to the soundtrack - particularly, the George Harrison song they included in it (I rest my case.) Anyway, it was still fun to hang with Kristin, and then I came back and CRASHED. Today, I worked out, ran a bunch of errands, and am now doing laundry. Wheee.

Thursday was the craziest day of work I've had yet. Multiple celebs walked by my desk (you'll have to ask me for specifics, I'm not going to post because I don't want to give out that kinda info on the interwebs, just in case!) and I got to transcribe my first interview, which was intense, but fun. We were let go early, at around 5:40pm or something, and Caroline and I were waiting for another co-intern, Sara, to get out of her other job and join us for dinner and drinks. We went to the H&M nearby, looked around, and then headed back towards our work building, where we were supposed to meet her. As we walked out of the store, I heard a man say, "He's left his 3 kids...breaking, Michael Jackson is dead," into his cell phone. When we left the office, we'd heard he had been rushed to the hospital, having suffered cardiac arrest or something like that. I flipped my head towards the man, my mouth agape and eyes wide. He looked at me, smiled faintly, and kind of shrugged, as if to say - "What can you do?" I flipped back to Caroline and told her what I'd heard, and we rushed back to the office to jump on the computers and see if it was true. TMZ was reporting he was dead, and I didn't even know what to do. It didn't seem official enough, or something. It was just too sudden. I suggested that we run over to see if our boss, Erica, was still there, and it was a really good thing we did, because she was and needed our help badly. I worked that day until a little after 11pm, taking a break for our collective free pizza dinner. It was unreal, it was crazy, I'm still coping. It's making me face my past in some ways, because Jackson's music is so evocative of my very young childhood. I remember dancing around to "Thriller" with my brother. I remember inviting MJ to my 3rd birthday party, and his "people" sending me a cassette tape with "Black or White" and "Remember the Time" on it. That was when we were living in Austin, after Edward had just been born, really. Anyway, of all the places I could have been, I'm so glad I was in the offices of Rolling Stone. The only better place would have been with my brother and mom, and we could have played his vinyls and danced around like we did when I was a toddler.

The city has been beautiful; it's been sunny sometimes, rainy sometimes, but always beautiful. Taking the brown line to Williamsburgh was my first New York experience on a subway train that goes above ground, and it reminded me vividly of my London adventure, and of Berlin. It was beautiful, and felt so much like a place I could call home for a few years. I feel that there is so much more to report, like Will Dana's (managing editor of RS) luncheon with the interns and the incredible things he said, like the movie "Away We Go" itself, with its hopeful and adventurous messages imbedded within, like somedays feeling completely fabulous and confident and other days feeling like I want to disappear. Finding myself is all a part of the game right now, just as it has been for the past four years. Rocks are overturned all of the time, and other times it is just hit home to me how much I am a thing I knew I was all along.

Sorry to be so sporadic and cryptic, loves. I have to go get my laundry.

New York City unknown...

Today was fantastic. Wednesday was fantastic. Life is freakin' good. I'll recap Wednesday a little, and then I'll do today, and then I'll probably finish eating this delicious Cadbury chocolate, and get to bed.

Wednesday, the interns (all 30 or 40 of us at Wenner Media, aka people in all different departments at all 3 magazines) had lunch with Jann Wenner, the founder of Rolling Stone. He was really cool, and it was crazy to be with this larger-than-life icon. He was friendly and had fun stories, and it was just so cool to be there. It was nice to be around the other interns, as well! Before we went to the lunch, we got briefed by Erica, our boss (who I adore). I asked her if it would be wierd for me to ask Rob Sheffield for his autograph when he hosts lunch with us in a few weeks, and she said not at all. WELL. When we got out of lunch, Chris and Shannekia (two interns at the office) came running back towards Caroline and me with wide eyes. They said, "OH MY GOSH, SHEFFIELD IS IN THE OFFICE!!" My mouth dropped open and I saw him walk past. I wanted to run away and hide, I was so overwhelmed. Erica told me she'd try to bring him by my desk later, and I thanked her. Caroline and I got back to work, and about an hour or so later, I sense two people standing behind me. There was Erica with freakin' Rob Sheffield, and I quickly pulled myself together and shook his hand. After introducing myself, I told him that I loved his writing, and that "Love Is A Mixtape" is one of my favorite books ever, and that it is beautiful. He thanked me sincerely, and then was introduced to Caroline. We all four got into a long discussion about Lifetime movies, Rock of Love, and other ridiculous pop culture things. It. Was. Amazing. Then he headed off, and Caroline and I freaked out. He later walked by while I was talking to Caroline, so I smiled and waved, and he returned the sentiment. I am in so much awe of that man. He is such a great writer, and he's such a nice man. Sigh.

I also am just loving the people I work with so, so much. I would love to work at Rolling Stone, with every fiber of my being. Caroline and I discussed that desire today when we were hanging out. We met up at 5:30, and then had a whirlwind tour of NYC. We hit up Rockefeller Center for a slice-o-pizza dinner, and chatted about the office. Then we wandered around for a while before deciding on going to the Staten Island ferry, and we rode a round trip (it's free!!) Manhattan and the Statue of Liberty at night. . .nothing prettier, I swear. It was so relaxing, and so much fun to chat someone up about music like that. We wandered around the fancy tip of Manhattan (near Battery Park) for a few minutes, and then we headed home! Home for Caroline is Long Island, so she had to get off at Penn Station, and I got off at Times Square (which was totally bustling) and caught my train home. It was a fabulous day, and I look forward to squeezing out as many more of these as I can while I'm here. Time is moving way, way too fast. It's good and bad at the same time. I will miss this SO much, I can already feel it, but my heart is also aching for friends back home. I wish there was a happy medium, where I could transport people here to live with me. I've said that before, but I can't help it. It's how I feel.

Time to finish my chocolate!! I'll try to update again soon:)

Oh, one last note - the rainboots came in today. HOORAY!!!!!! (Tomorrow's forecast = rainy!)

Love, don't let it go/Won't you take me where the streetlights glow.

I won't lie - I'm posting at the moment to avoid homework. It was a busy day, and I just want a break before I jump into reading about the history of our country.

Friday, my pal Jessica from Connecticut came up for a visit, and it was GLORIOUS. We met up at Grand Central, and it was my first time exploring the giant/famous station. It's big and fabulous, just as I expected. Although, with all due respect to NYC, I have to say my favorite station is still Berlin's, because it's just so freakin' HUGE! It's a mall!!!

After getting a little lost walking around the area, we finally got ourselves oriented and headed towards MoMA (the Museum of Modern Art), our first destination for the day. We stopped off at a place called Monster Sushi, which was pretty delish and reasonably priced, but I still prefer IchiRoh (not sure if I spelled that right) just down the road from my homebase. We headed from 42/Lexington (Grand Central) to Monster Sushi (50-something and 6th, I think) and then to MoMA, which was at 53rd and 6th, or something like that. We then spent a good number of hours perusing modern art - Dahli, Picasso, Klimt, Warhol, Pollock, and so many, many more. My absolute favorite was probably "The Empire of Light, II" by Rene Magritte. It's just such a captivating and beautiful painting; it looks like a photograph, really. Except for the whole "it'd be impossible to have night and day at the same time" thing. Details, details.

After this, we walked down a block or two to Magnolia Bakery, and had a tasty caramel cupcake apiece. Then it was off to the Central Park entrance for the Josh Ritter show! We walked from 49th and 6th in the completely wrong direction (both in terms of avenues AND blocks) for an avenue and a block apiece, and then righted ourselves. We walked all the way to 69th and 5th, which, after an entire day on your feet, makes you a little worn out. We also tried to find a grocery store on the way for a picnic at Central Park, but to no avail - we ran into Madison and Park avenues when we tried to find anything, and apparently, people in the area just don't ever eat or get injuries. Anywho, all was well once we finally got into the venue, because they were selling food there! In the interim, we waited in line with a freakin' ton of other folks, and my friend Jade and Jessica's friend Michelle joined us. We traded life and concert stories, and generally yakked it up until we entered the premises. We found a comfy spot on the bleachers at the back of the venue, and set up shop. A veggie burger, bottle of water and cookie later, I was ready for some music. The New York Pops, who were Ritter's back-up band for the evening, opened the night with a song. Then Josh came out to many cheers and happy hoots, and he ripped up the stage with beautiful, lyrically vibrant songs that blended seamlessly with the summer night. Guest stars for SummerStage's opening night of free shows included Hilary Hahn (an INSANELY famous violinist, for those of you who are not orchestra nerds like me), Mark Strand (poet and current Columbia U prof), and freakin' GLEN HANSARD (from "Once," and lead singer of The Frames.) I shrieked when they announced his name, and people turned around to ask me who he was. SO excited!!! All in all the day was fabulous.

The next day, I slept a LOT to make up for using so much energy the day before. I honestly don't really remember what else I did...I know that Jade and I met up, began to watch "Junebug" (which I now need to rent and see fully), and then headed to a bar called "Off The Wagon" to meet her sister and sister's friends for a night of debauchery. I didn't participate long; at 11pm, I decided to call it a night. I'm just not one to bar it, really. But it was great to spend time with Jade, 'cause she's a super cool girl.

Yesterday, I did a decent amount of homework, and watched "High School Musical 3" (DO NOT MOCK ME) with Jade, her roommate Caitlin and my roommate Kate. Melissa's been out all weekend, and I can't WAIT for her return; she's been sorely missed.

Today was a full, busy, happy happy happy day. I got up early, worked out, and then got myself ready to go to Trader Joe's, a much cheaper Whole Foods located only in the northeast, I guess (or at least, I'd never heard of it before this summer/my roommates.) I bought some strawberries, bananas, two microwaveable quiches, string cheese, applesauce and peanuts - great breakfast and lunchtime snacks, all (sans the quiches, which will be in-a-pinch dinner solutions. They were less than $2 a piece!!!) When I got back, the roommate was off to work, so I had a little lunch, waited in the room for our AC fixer guy to finish up, and headed to Queens all by my lonesome. I was a little worried I'd get lost, but I shouldn't have been - it was really quite easy to navigate! I was on the subway train for a LONG time, but finally ended up at my stop, which looked more like a street in Texas than one in NYC - cars, cars everywhere. I crossed the street to the mall, and headed into Forever 21, H&M, and Urban Outfitters to try to find appropriate stuff for my Wednesday luncheon with JANN WENNER. I don't even know what to do with myself, honestly. I'm thinking up questions all of the time, but I could honestly just see myself being so overwhelmed that I just squeak every time I open my mouth. Phew. Anyway, tons of stuff I tried on was ADORABLE, and I ended up with two dresses and some black tights (oh, hipster me!) when all was said and done. Then I came back (a 4-hour adventure, all things told) and had some dinner! Now I've been letting my stomach rest, and it's finally time to get back to homework. Gotta call it an early night so I'm well-rested for work tomorrow! S'long for now.

It's been agreed the whole world stinks, so no one's takin' showers anymore.

Well, well, well. It seems that New York City has won my heart. I absolutely love it here. It's exciting, it's fluid, it's different, it's huge, it's awesome. Now, I think part of my complete adoption of my new home comes from the knowledge that I will be heading back to Austin very soon, so I don't feel like I need to miss my Texas home. If I were here for the long haul already, I'd definitely have some homesickness, but not yet. I am still trying to plan a way to kidnap my pals and bring them here to live with me. I mean, think about it - if I brought the 7 or 8 people I'd want to bring with me up here, and we all lived in a house together, it might even be affordable! We could have a TV show about ourselves, too.

I discovered the "Best Week Ever" blog today, and it's SO FUNNY. I'm not the biggest fan of the TV show; the last time I watched, it was very much the type of sad humor that I imagine my middle school buddies and I might come up with. But the blog is just fantastic. Laugh out loud funny.

I'm loving work, I'm loving our latest issue that just hit stands, just loving Rolling Stone generally. The Conor Oberst article is beautiful; I totally recommend it.

I had my first coffee drink this week, and nearly became addicted - a caramel frappuccino from Starbucks. I had one Tuesday, and couldn't help but indulge again Wednesday. Today, I opted for a can of Coca-Cola to get my caffeine kick. Way cheaper, and not quite as detrimental to my health:-P But I'm sure I'll be indulging in the sugary Starbucks creation every now and again. I feel vaguely adult, indulging in a coffee drink. If I switch to straight-up coffee (...with a significant dosage of sugar and milk/creme), I'll really feel like I've crossed the threshold. I'll try to put that off until I graduate in December.

Still loving my living quarters, and overcame a bout of self-consciousness that reared its head this week. As I have been discussing with a few of you Texans, a big problem I've personally faced is remaining true to my no-diet-ever-again-because-diets-do-not-work status. A majority of the friends I've been making here are insanely health conscious, or else they just don't like sweets the way I do. Example: sharing with the roommate that I discovered the caramel frappuccino elicited a "those are so bad!!" to which I, quite surprised, responded, "I thought they were delicious!" And she explained, no, bad FOR you. She said they had too many calories for her to really enjoy them. I had to do a lot of self-talk, reminding myself that comments like that are bred from our dieting culture, and possibly even jealousy at someone actually enjoying a food for its merit of taste. OK, jealous isn't the right word, but it's that subconsciousness of needing to suck others into the calorie-counting norm. I refuse!! I trust that, if I overcome my emotional eating, I will be able to listen to my body's hunger signals, figure out what I'm hungry for, and figure out when I'm satiated. Anyway, sorry for that not-so-New-York update, but that's been something swimming around my brain and I wanted to flush it out a little.

I went to the Virgin Megastore in Union Square on Monday, for their HUGE closing sale. Yep, Virgin is DONE. Record stores in general are having troubles figuring out how to make money, because music has moved to digital format in such a big way. I am glad that this will be better for the environment, but I am going to miss the record store experience SO much. I did get great deals, though: 50% off all music and DVDs!!! 60% and up off other stuff, like clothes and "fixture" items (store TVs, etc.) They are literally selling everything in the store.

The rest of the week has been a whirl of history homework and work. I've been packing my lunches and eating in to save money, so hopefully that's been working. Tomorrow, Jessica (my friend from Connecticut) is coming in to spend the day being touristy with me, and then we're going to the free Summerstage performance by Josh Ritter! Woot:) This is good, because a)I haven't really been able to explore New York as much as I'd like, and b)I haven't been able to hang out in Central Park at ALL. Time to do those things! I *did* go to "Taste of Times Square" on Monday, which was awesome: normally super ritzy and expensive Times Square restaurants were giving away food samples for x number of tickets (which you purchased beforehand; one ticket = one dollar.) Our residential group got 5 tickets, which I spent on a water bottle, a slice of pizza, bread pudding and a brownie. AWESOME. In retrospect, I'd have preferred the cheesecake sample to the brownie, but what can you do? Live and learn!

I'm trying to figure out a way to get to ONE Broadway show this summer. Not sure which one I'd want to do! The residents are going to see Avenue Q for cheap, so that's a tempting option. I dunno, though - I've heard that The Lion King is stunning, and I'm interested in Spring Awakening (is it even still on Broadway??) Weigh in, friends and fam!!

OK, gotta jet - office meeting in five minutes!

TONY'S!

OK, so I definitely have tons to fill you all in on, but I just want a running list of the celebs I saw when my friends Kate, Jade and I stood across the street from the Radio City Music Hall while people filed into the building for the Tony awards. SUCH a great idea!! And, I do have some pictures, but they're pretty terrible:-P
Will Ferrell
Allison Janney
Liza Minnelli
John Stamos
Anne Hathaway<3<3<3<3
Marcia Gay Harden
Jane Fonda
Bret Michaels
Steven Webber
Jeff Daniels
Kevin Spacey
I *think* that was all, but I will definitely update if I remember more.

I've been exploring the city to an extent, so I will try to update about that soon. My time is so limited and I try to get out as much as possible. OK, be back later!!

I know New York, I need New York, I know I need unique New York.

I'm settling in! It's been a week STUFFED with activity. I wanted to keep better track of everything, but I think (with all of the stuff I still need to do, i.e. begin my online history courses, do the work for the internship course, sleep and work out someday?) I will stick to a brief recap, touching on highlights that I can remember.

I love where I work. I'm not always super busy, but now that I know this is the case, I'm going to bring my schoolbooks with me to work. During downtown, I'll knock out some chapters or something. And then, of course, when I end up bringing books and suddenly am busy every second of my day...that'll work out, too! Anyway, the location of the RS office is PRIME. I love being in the Rockefeller Center/Times Square bustle. The subway can be a little crazy, depending on when I'm riding it (the ride home is always insane). But it's all a part of the experience! And now that I have learned to listen to my iPod on my ride, it's much more pleasant.

Loving the roommates, they are fantastic ladies. I'm still meeting people and getting to know people, and there are high points and low points with that. Sometimes people surprise you in a good way, and sometimes, they surprise you in a not so good way. It's OK, though, because it all helps me figure out myself a little bit better.

Speaking of that, I haven't really had ANY "me" time yet, so I'm really hoping to find that. I know I'll get it when I exercise, at the very least. I'm going to run tomorrow, probably just on the treadmill in the gym, but maybe at C. Park if the weather is nice enough.

I really, really enjoy my co-interns. I finally met my third today, and he is just as nice as the first two. That makes the work environment a lot better, of course. He's a HUGE fan of The Smiths, which made me think of Edward.

That's the one drawback, I guess. I think of people I love back home, and I miss them so, so much. I wish I could just magically transport all of you here to be with me. Then it'd be just perfect! I guess that makes the busyness welcomed, though - I haven't had a whole lot of time to think about who and what I'm missing. Cheap stuff is a big one, though:P

Tonight, I am going to dinner with some residents, and then who knows? Part of me wants to get to bed early because I'm exhausted, but the other part says, I don't have to work tomorrow!!! Time to live it UP! We'll see which part wins out.

David Byrne plays a free show Monday that I'm going to try like everything to get into, and I'm going to see Josh Ritter play a free show with Jessica and and friend -

OK, so I was writing this up at work, and had to get BACK to work, so I know that was an awkward and abrupt place to end, but it's time for me to get some rest.

'Til next time!

Gone, gone [to] New York City.

Day 2(ish); technically, I arrived just about this time yesterday in the room I'm currently inhabiting. There's a TV with free cable directly above my bed, tons of storage space (although it took me a while to figure out where everything would go), a window (out to...brick walls:P), a fridge/freezer with a microwave sitting on top, and three of us sleeping and eating and generally living in here. I didn't sleep a wink before my flight up here, so I was understandably exhausted. I basically made it through yesterday on adrenaline alone (especially because I also was only able to eat half of a muffin during my travels!) I met some friends on my second flight from Charlotte, North Carolina to La Guardia here in NYC, and one of them actually lives in a different EHS building, just about 40 blocks from me in Manhattan! We exchanged contact info, and we also shared a cab (saved me about 5 or 8 bucks or something). Plus, it was just nice to have a friend on the first leg of the cab ride. One of my favorite parts about yesterday = seeing the Statue of Liberty from the plane. It looked a lot smaller from way up in the air, but it was still cool. I also was reminded just how much water is around New York; there's a LOT! When I got into the residence and checked myself in, I headed up to my room (10th floor!) and introduced myself to one of my roommates, Kate, who is from Michigan and interning with Comedy Central. Way cool! We chatted for a while, and I tried to fix my computer's power plug (long, uninteresting and annoying story - it's fixed now, that's the important part.) Then our third roommate came back from shopping at Kmart (gotta hit that up, I bet it's much cheaper than stuff around here!) and she introduced herself. Her name is Melissa, and she's interning for W Magazine (the fashion mag.)

Then, at around 5pm, Kate and I went to a sushi place just a few blocks over from here, and I had two rolls (sweet potato and avocado/cucumber), both were AMAZING (of course I was famished so I'm pretty sure anything I put in my face was going to taste amazing.) They also brought us fresh sliced pineapple and orange - key to my HEART, I tell you! Then we trudged back to the room, and I continued unpacking and tried to stay alert until our little meet and greet at 8pm. I met the other Texan in the residence (we just happened to be sitting next to each other - I guess we're drawn together or something!) and she is super sweet. Her name is Angelina, and she's taking some theater classes. I also met Jan, who is super boisterous and a little too rowdy for me. I think he was taking classes at the New York Film Academy. After we went around the (giant!!) circle and everyone introduced themselves, we got a rundown of rules and such, and then Angelina and I introduced ourselves to two other girls, Antonia and Caroline. Super sweet ladies, and we all exchanged phone numbers so we could grab food and do all that crazy stuff.

A lot of people here are health/exercise nuts, which is going to be a little difficult for me because of my eating disorder. I just need to keep my head high and keep reading my books! I want to keep meeting people and making friends, but by the same token, I want to also focus on finishing my two history classes in a speedy (and A+!) manner, and to kick butt at my internship. For now, I need to get a move on; I'm going to go buy my month-long subway pass, and then I'm going to take the subway to my work so I'll be ready for tomorrow morning, my first day (eep!) Then I want to get back in time for a walking tour of the neighborhood with other residents, at 6pm. It's already quarter to 4, so it's time to go! I'll check back in soon, I'm sure. For now, my overwhelming feelings are: excitement, homesickness (hardcore, I miss you all:(,) and "OK, I can do this!"-ness.